Perspective can sometimes come from unexpected places and at unexpected times. I got together with a friend the other day and was provided with a healthy dose of perspective. You see, she is pregnant with number 2. Normally, that would make me feel a pang of jealousy, but not this time. It turns out that she is having some pretty serious marital problems. As in, probably would’ve left him if she hadn’t gotten pregnant. As in, went to counselling and it never really went anywhere. She’s not quite using the ‘D’ word but definitely sounds like she is getting really close to that. And now, here she is, pregnant with number 2 and feeling pretty stuck; feeling like she doesn’t have a choice but to stay.
In hearing my friend talk about the challenges she is facing, I couldn’t help but feel lucky, which is a welcome change to the ‘feeling sorry for myself’ that I had been doing for much of the past year. I felt lucky because even though my hubby and I are facing a tough situation, at least we are in it together and (generally) not fighting at each other. We are facing this head on and helping each other through it. It reminded me that even though it took us 9 long years to actually get married, I found the right guy and that we really are a great team. Being with him has made the past year that much easier because he has been my rock when I’ve been sad and I’ve tried to do the same for him.
So with that perspective, I continue to look forward. I look forward to what is in store for us and am optimistic that our path will start to lead in a different direction, away from all this infertility business… And I know that I am lucky that we will be on this path together, facing the bumps and dead ends together.